a post- post

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i’m having a little trouble catching my breath here. whew—what a week.
everything seemed to be going fine until around tuesday. i know tuesday was only the second day of the week, but i’m trying to stay positive here . . .

so monday good, and tuesday busy, but productive, and i still got some knitting and spinning in. then wednesday.

suddenly the schedule for this book deadline at work was squeezed yet again. the project coordinator was practically weeping over trying to even make a schedule. and somehow we decided that probably i could manage to run edits on two books each day for the next week or so (that’s a very tight . . . no, it’s a nearly impossible schedule, and i’m drowning here. in fact, i’ve been a wreck. the edits are . . . let’s just say, “extensive”. with two weeks to go they are still chopping the book into pieces on every round. but so far, i’m just barely keeping up). heh.

and that’s when i dropped out of sight guys. my apologies. anyway

wow—another year gone! well, i don’t mind; this year has been amazing and has completely recharged my life batteries. i mean, i don’t know what happens to other people, or how they perceive themselves through their experiences, but i like to keep things moving in my life, to always be working toward some new horizon, trying new things, while building upon what i did before.

for various reasons, 2004 and 2005 were full of uncertainty for me—the kind that felt too static and ate away at my self esteem. lots of little things were good, but i didn’t feel i was making progress on Big Life Goals. there were things i wanted to do, but felt i did not have the tools or the confidence to make them happen. and time was passing, and my awareness of that was becoming quite visceral. i also felt a little isolated—having left the huge culture of NYC to live in the midwest, i was still finding my bearings in our new home. with more time and space to do my work, and less expense, i felt poised to take a stab at a new venture, but lacked a context in which to do it.

what i wanted most of all was to get my knitting designs out in a national market. i enjoyed selling my patterns at the local yarn shop, and i wanted to build a business out of it, so that i could have more choices in how i spend my working time some day. (i love my job, but at times there has been a lot of nerve-wracking uncertainty about how long that job would be an option for me.)
and i desperately wanted to try my hand at writing—i had a long suppressed this desire and it was eating me up.

now, i don’t see myself as some sort of amazon warrior who surges ahead on the attack, takes charge, makes the kill, and then revels in specific highlights of glory. mostly i feel like i stumble along trying this and that in an attempt to satisfy what is clearly the next step, never knowing if it is the right thing. i mean, i am a person who does things bit by bit, so that the cumulative effect of accomplishment never seems to have that WOW factor. somehow, in my search to take the next step, stumbled into the universe of knitblogging.

after reading the Yarn Harlot’s first book, i got hooked on her blog, and quickly discovered Wendy Knits!, Enchanting Juno, See Eunny Knit!, DancesWithWool, and a few others.

and david discovered podcasts for me. i started listening to Cast On, KnitCast, Pointy Sticks, The Mosh Knit, and some single casts he found for me.

as i read and listened i got very itchy to respond, to comment, and finally, to establish a place for myself to write. i love it immediately, even though the simplest tasks of getting the blog going were foreign to me. every single step was hard at first—it took at least two weeks for me to figure out how to post a picture, and another several weeks to figure out how to put a link into a post. heck, it took several weeks to figure out that a lot of my troubles were due to the fact that i was using an incompatible browser. (that why the earliest posts were relegated to the trash.)
fortunately, i am all-too-familiar with the fact that intial failures and foibles do not spell disaster in the long run (i am a knitter after all). and gentle pointers from Persnickety Knitter and deb helped me make things smoother for readers.

i participated in the knitting olympics, wrote about podcasting, knit skirts, ranted, raved, and raised money. and SO, so much more.

in august, i began using my blog to launch my patterns, which was a huge turning point for me, even if it was rather unplanned. it’s been a tremendous outlet for my work, so much so that i have not even begun to digest the possibilities.

and that raising money part? it is a permanent fixture here. every month we send 10% of the pattern proceeds to an organization in need. i feel it is the biggest accomplishment of all, and just a small way to pay back the universe AND ALL OF YOU READERS, for showering me with so much good fortune.

so now, you wanna see my cake and presents??
hahaha! i bet you do!

well, actually this birthday began on wednesday, when janet, maureen, and anne brought goodies to class and made a party. that’s the half-eaten cake you saw up top—yeah, we devoured it. birthday cake doesn’t have calories between 4 and 6 pm on wednesday (ditto for chips and salsa, hummus, and tapenade).

and then, the next night, i found this hidden in my purse from that sneaky, naughty, wonderful maureen

are those luscious or what? i love dark pearls—mmm, can’t wait to wear those.
my buddy kim in san diego, who is sadly blogless (and a real loss too, becasue she is HILARIOUS), sent me a package full of chocolate, some “knitspot” cocktail napkins, and a chicken card

i wish you could hear the chicken play the accordian. i keep opening the card to listen to it and laugh. it will probably be the very first such card in history to have its battery run down from overuse . . .

my friend leah in nashville, who you might remember knit a sample of the doll-sized moth shawl back in august, sent me this

a trekking colorway i have not used yet and another cute card! i love knitting with trekking—it appeals to my love of surprises.
i also rceived this week a luscious new DK yarn from Briar Rose Fibers, named wistful

we had chatted a month or so ago about collaborating on a shawl project and she mentioned she would be dyeing a new fiber and would like to use that. well, this is it and—oh boy.
its real sexy guys—alpaca, merino, and silk—i can’t keep my hands off it, so put it in the cedar closet where it will be safe. i’m thinking large needles and a rectangular stole—something that will go round my shoulders and cover my legs when i’m lounging . . . or i could wear when i want to copy david in his obstacles shawl (he’s been wearing it and it looks so hot!)

yesterday dawned cold and windy—temperatures have been hovering near zero for the last day (it’s minus 1° now) and the furnace seems to never shut off. there was a card from mom in the mail

i don’t know how she does it but the card always comes ON the birthday—never before or after. i went off to yoga class with my friend kris, whose birthday is today. i brought her these

and she gave me a private yoga lesson as a gift. we stretched and saluted the sun and twisted and all was well. then i had classes all afternoon. when i got home, david had a cake waiting

every year he bakes me one and i look forward to it each time. it’s the most thoughtful gift; david doesn’t enjoy cooking all that much, but he will do it for me (often, too), and i treasure that in him.

we met up again with kris, beckie, stephanie, mark, jeff, and david for dinner at a wonderful local middle-eastern restaurant. it was awesome and i ate my fill. we went back to our to talk

and eat the cake that beckie brought—carrot cake, mmm.
do you see where this is going? right. as soon as i finish work today, i’m heading for the bike.

eh, who am i kidding—after work, i’ll probably head for my knitting. back to the usual tomorrow.

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